The Trump Diaries 2024
by Barry Robbins

"I’ve got a really good topic tonight… but for the life of me, I can’t remember what it is."

Satirist Robbins has composed a future view of former president Donald Trump, garnered from Trump’s fictional diaries in the year 2024. The humor rolls from the outset when Trump admits he has hired a “translator” to convert his “drivel into real English.” While some of each day’s ramblings reference Trump’s continuing, outrageous aspirations to take back the White House in the elections coming up in November 2024, some of his daily scribbles sustain the hilarity with simple, human diversions: his attempts to make a truly smooth smoothie; his frustrations with the popular Wordle game (and his proposal to create an alternative to be called “Trumple”); his annoyance arising when the Mar-a-Lago chef decides to switch to brewing real coffee after years of serving him instant; and coping with problems with the toilets at Mar-a-Lago, problems possibly caused by his flushing away all the bills he gets from plumbing companies.

Pure politics come to the fore for the reader’s amusement in sixteen of the eighty-seven entries in Trump’s journal, as he concentrates his attention on such notables as Pete Buttigieg, recommending a more pronounceable surname for his colleague, like “Bribeajudge,” and laments that his “Nancy Pelosi voodoo doll” has run out of spaces to stick pins in as he watches developments in the ongoing presidential race. His attempts to turn Ron DeSantis into a successful Trump substitute look hopeless when he discovers that DeSantis actually went to Yale and Harvard and served honorably in the military. In order to get the voters that were attracted to Trump, the former president tells DeSantis he will need to have several business failures and divest himself of all understanding of real policy issues. Trump communicates with his old pal Putin, now in prison, and has regular Zoom meetings with “the highly prestigious Autocrats Club.”

Author Robbins, a former accountant turned award-winning humor writer, has constructed a series he calls the Oh Daddy Chronicles in the past two years, of which this work is the latest addition. Living overseas opened Robbins to a different perspective on his American homeland, which has doubtlessly contributed to his ability to show U.S. politicians and their interactions, both overt and covert, and especially the mad machinations of Trump, in a unique, enlivening light. Robbins’ overview is satirical yet sage, grounded in an enviable talent for sharp observation and deft encapsulation.

The diary template is a clever device, contributing pace and allowing the future Donald to muse over memories, divulge hilariously scurrilous secrets, reveal his own foibles and those of his political cohort, and occasionally complain and whine about day-to-day mishaps. Robbins critiques the former president—with Trump revealing much material for mockery merely by being himself—and a few political players on the other side of the aisle with equal, sardonic humor. Some of the book’s happenings are, in fact, already being played out on the American political stage at the time of his book’s release, which will contribute to its laugh quotient. This, combined with Robbins’ gifts as a wordsmith as amply shown in these richly mined, mirthful moments, will give his book a wide audience of thoughtful readers who will appreciate the relaxation of a good laugh at the antics of those charged with running their nation.

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