When I Became Never
by Nathalie Guilbeault
Montreal Publishing Company


"Memories move, sculpted, sometimes by dangerous understandings, sometimes by the consistency of our wants. Memory—a shapeshifter made of unreliable truths."

The novel begins in 1927, a time in Spain’s history riddled with political unrest and religious corruption. Descended from the proud Moorish lineage, vintner Romero Munduya and his family are considered Morenos, their dark skin rendering them unacceptable to God according to the Catholic Church. This calls into question the Munduyas’ right to remain on their land and leaves the family at the mercy of Father Antonio Ruiz. But the priest is using the Word of God to hide untold treachery. The story continues with Romero Munduya’s grandson Julián Rodriguez, who escapes war-torn Spain only to be recruited by a viscous Nicaraguan general. Tragedy fuels Julián’s chilling transformation from a loving child to a diabolical monster who, through abuse, cultivates the next generation of sociopaths. Julián’s son Benjamin inherits an insatiable thirst for violence and perpetuates the legacy of domestic abuse. Through charisma and psychological manipulation, Benjamin carves an international path of terror, leaving countless victims in his wake.

Guilbeault opens with an ornate, descriptive writing style to establish the Munduya family history. She uses the historical demonization of the Moors as the basis for her characters’ self-hatred and subsequent psychosis, probing the concept of racism as the pathogenesis of mental instability. Repulsed by their family’s legacy of dark skin and coarse hair, Julián and Benjamin Rodriguez are simultaneously attracted by and compelled to victimize women with white skin. The novel explores inherent sociopathic tendencies versus the cultivation of violence. The author depicts the many forms of sexual deviance, from marital infidelity to child molestation, rape, prostitution, and incest. The author gives readers a poignant front-row seat to the devastation wreaked in victims’ lives and the subsequent overpowering longing for vengeance and vindication. Guilbeault uses tension and mystery to spin an imaginative tale that takes readers into the minds of sadistic killers.

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