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Teacher, Teacher, I Declare...!
And Other Little Tattle Tales by W. Royce Adams Rairarubia Books
book review by Allison Whittenberg
"Then I blurted out the parental 'just-what-do-you-think-you're-doing' and 'where-have-you-been' and 'who-were-you-with' stuff."
Teacher, Teacher, I Declare...! And Other Little Tattle Tales is a collection of twenty short stories written by prolific author W. Royce Adams. Some of these stories were originally published in literary magazines such as Dogwood Tales, Happy, Neologisms, and The Rockford Review and all of them have to do in some form or fashion with the vocation of teaching. An Emeritus Professor of English of Santa Barbara City College, Adams writes from a wealth of personal experience.
The book is divided in three parts: beginnings, middles, endings. Over the next two hundred pages, we meet several types of teachers at various stages of their careers. These characters are not just in the classroom but engaged in pursuits outside school. Adams writing style cannot be pinned down: some stories range only two pages, others go on to almost novella length. In "Save" the author is restrained and meticulous as in which superannuated math teacher Alfred Nipple "would begin writing on the board, his back to the class, forgetting them, writing on and on until every inch of the board was covered with formulas and diagrams." In another story, "Student Teacher" Adams experiments with shock value in his opening lines, "Beat her? No. Never. Hit her? Mmm. Once, Just once, sad to say. Slapped her face."
Other notable stories include "Teaching 101," "Home Schooling," and "The Chalk Line." With its easily relatable characters, setting and situations, Teacher, Teacher, I Declare...! is genteelly humorous and often insightful into the many different people who make up this profession.